“The impediment and the challenge is the blessing itself.”

Just look with your eyes, and you will see the wicked punished. Because you’ve made the LORD my refuge, the most high, your place of residence- no evil will happen to you; no disease will come close to your tent. Because he will order his messengers to help you, to protect you wherever you go. They will carry you with their own hands so you don’t bruise your foot on a stone. You’ll march on top of lions and vipers; you’ll trample young lions and serpents underfoot. Psalms 91:8-13

Angel number 222 is considered to be a very powerful message from God. According to scripture, seeing 222 is symbolic of unity, love, and our relationship with God.

August was a month of mental recovery. After fixating on the idea of healing I lost track of the motion of living. Feeling dead while you’re alive has to be one of the craziest feelings because honestly, nobody will understand unless they’re going through their own cycle of misery. In the beginning that is all you feel and then you get to a point where you no longer want to relive your own funeral on a daily basis. For the past 2 weeks, I’ve been gazing at cemetaries as if I would one day pull over, walk to my designated tombstone, and climb into my little hole. I’ve been doing that for the majority of my life. Whenever things feel a little too much, I’ll climb into my personalized shell and disassociate myself with the outside world. I look at it like my cape saving my own self. Theres nothing wrong with this process, I actually honor it and utilize it differently every time. Some call it hermit mode, I call it BEAST MODE. When you’re blessed you move different, there’s no need to mourn it’s time to Level the fuck UP.

The things that begins to curate within the mind is not something to be understood by others, only by you until it fully comes full circle. Spending all of that energy trying to get people on the same page feels like a failed social experiment but you continuously reintroduce the agenda just for it to burst into flames before your eyes. One thing about this life, it will teach you to always remain present so that you’re able to truly feel the transitions into the next chapter. It’s when you build anticipation towards something it becomes somewhat of a fixed fantasy.

I no longer identify as The Wounded Healer. That weight that I choose to carry no longer relates to what I’ve experienced in the past. Everything connects but it’s all so different based on a simple choice, Happiness. It low-key feels like a scab I’ve been picking on for mad long, but I became my own bully in the process. Sabotaging my ability to dream, to be loving freely, to be @Peace with things that I can no longer control, and over extending myself in relationships that genuinely has no placement in my reality.

I use to think everyone that I met was placed here to love and bless me with their presence but It was a naive way of perceiving the world. Even the inclination to feel like some people are fixable was an unfortunate nightmare that I had to snap myself out of. Everyone has a role to play in your life but there is always the possibility that they will embody personalities that conflict with how you’re programmed. LET IT BE.

How many times are you going to be a victim like Alice? Curiously falling into a rabbit whole of illusions and delusions that leads you to many discoveries of self, but also the disappointing factor of how life goes. I recently came across this cool ass keychain in the dollar store and I was so captivated by it. Once I saw the 6, along with Sirena I knew it was for me without a doubt. After reading a few chapters of ” The Art of Seduction”, I realized that I resignate with many of the personality traits but the Siren relates to the bold and fearless side of me so it was giving me Leo Moon Vibes but I’ll let you decide. The keychain represented a half woman, half mermaid creature that grew up in a home that conflicted with who she aspired to be. Her mother like many, assigned her with chores to complete but she’d sneak off and spend quality time in the nearby river because she LOVED the water. Her mother would curse her and say ” Since Sirena loves the water more than anything, she should become a fish!” The power of the tongue can be the birth of your worst nightmare but she quickly tried to rebuttal her wish by saying “leave the part of her that belongs to ME, as human”. It was really the sense of entitlement for me but I digress. Suddenly, the lower half of her body transformed into a fish with scales while the top portion of her body remained as beautiful as before. She has yet to return home ever since, she has now became one with the water which was the very thing she loved and valued her time for. Like Sirena, I’ve found a way to cross over to a place that feels more sacred to my existence. Spending your life serving those who would never understand you feels like death. In someway, I feel like Sirena felt a rebirth within herself to sacrifice all that she knew in order to be in a place that feels more like home. She knew that her decision was ordained by God, not out of rebellion or any sort of revenge.

It was beautiful learning how to find a new way to identify with my reality because It was a challenge to find figures I can relate to. Although I was once Alice, I’m now embodying the beautiful transformation Sirena has experienced because she truly felt more abundant in her own element. Consider the odds of what life could be after healing. Life after death feels like you’re being pushed out the coochie once more but you’re coming out of yourself, your shell, your “Safe place”. Death can represent your rebirth once you learn how to truly shed from the familiar realities you once were apart of. When you associate yourself with places, people, or things that no longer suites you anymore, you will go through reoccurring cycles that somewhat feels like punishment from God. He will speak to you in ways that are unbearable and you’ll eventually release the old version of you effortlessly. Release the struggle, embrace the beauty you’re being granted after the storm.

This chapter will highlight the beauty of the rebirth, like in many things there will be polarity so there will be no fluff just a new way of living and walking in my life’s purpose. Spending your precious life healing is a prison sentence, LIVE ALITTLE.