Wow, We’ve finally made it to the end of 2021. What a year full of lots of suffering, transformation, and truths. This year has been a blessing in disguise in ways that I could have never imagined. Through the times where I was super hard on myself for not having it all together, I thank God for letting me wait because things are so much more awarding when you have to put in the work for it. I learned how to be more patient with my process of illimination because quite frankly, I wanted to cancel everyone in my life one by one. Being irrational and impulsive with my actions only lead me to feel alone in the past and in order for me to grow I need real niggas on my team. Instead of wanting more money, friends, and for my business to grow. I obtained more stability, security, peace, more loving connections, and as a bonus, beautiful home to create new memories with my loved ones. Lately, I’ve been reflecting on all the work that was put into creating this life of my own and I’m so overwhelmed with gratitude for the time and effort that was put in to create a masterpiece.
I’m proud of myself for creating a blueprint that is giving me the opportunity to be the woman, the writer, the wellness coach, the digital creator, the girlfriend, and the friend that I’ve always wanted to be. I’ve always been good at these things but, I somewhat suppressed my inner strength to because I felt like I was too much all at once, until I realized that it’s apart of my calling to be alittle too much. I think right now it’s all about who and what is worthy of experiencing this “too much” of a person that I am. It’s not easy to always surpress your greatest power because it lives within you each and every day and it will hurt you more to ignore the things that come very natural to you. Now that I’m more accepting of who I am, I’m able to fully show up for myself without any need for validation. As a Leo moon, I enjoy compliments so I will never sit here and say I don’t enjoy that aspect of being a fucking star…. But I’ve been able to validate myself by doing things that fills my heart with joy without being told to do so and to me, that’s growth.
Kundalini Inner G
Kundalini is considered to be a life-force energy, meaning it’s a major source of internal power. We all have it, but not all of us have experienced it as “awakening.”
I’ve been able to obtain more wisdom from simply sitting down with myself and doing shadow work to resolve any internal issues that I’ve been facing for far too long. All of the things I use to blame others for, no longer lives rent free in my head because Ju gata pay! I’ve allowed others to dictate my happiness to the point where I was driving myself crazy trying to please them within the process. Then, I had to get to the root of the issue. I had to realize that I am my own safe space and my job is to simply BE. Who ever I am, is enough and there’s no need to go outside of myself to prove anything to anyone outside of me. Getting to the root means connecting with your root chakra. The root chakra is sometimes referred to as the Muladhara chakra — for its feminine energy. The Muladhara chakra is the first of seven chakras located at the base of the spine hence why it’s so painful to heal this particular aspect of self. Our internal bodies structure is based off of the strength of the spine and when we abandon our structure(aka our needs/desires) we neglect ourselves from obtaining true peace and happiness.
Coming to terms with my truth allowed me to feel more connected my own perception of what happiness is because it does exist and it’s very tangible. Earlier this year, I was so insecure and I didn’t give myself enough compassion to take it easy during such a fragile time in my life. I wanted it all, all at once and I had to learn the hard way by one releasing everyone who deprived me of dreaming big. I always remember having visions of being in a graveyard, showing up for multiple funerals but nobody around me was physically dying but subconsciously, they we’re departing from me spiritually. I had to learn that detaching from things that continuously disappointed me was necessary because my soul contract no longer resonates with suffering, that is an outdated agreement. Once I was able to purge out all of the people, places, and things that no longer gave me the security I deserved, all that I’ve dreamed of came flowing to me naturally. I had to do a checkin to see what my “What’s next” was and all I heard was to simply “Just be you”.
Who I am, is who I’ve always wanted to be and that feels good to say. I gained strength, a new perspective, a new community, new ways of making money, and an overall new lifestyle that allows me to now be so paranoid about things that are happening outside of me. I had to connect to my roots in order to gain the inner strength to show up as my true raw-thentic self. At first, it felt like the long dark tunnel that everyone refers to, but then I was able to see the light and I began to shine in ways that truly resonated with who I am as a person. I’m not a sad girl, I’m not broken, I’m not frantic, I’m confident, I’m loving, I’m silly, I’m wise, I am all that I am. No matter how chaotic life may be, life is good. I no longer carry the weight of being unsure of my strength because God has proven to me that I can be anyone I devote my time to be whether for the good or the bad, I will be just fine.
As the days progress and we move into a new year, take some time to reflect on the past, present, future, and thank God/the Universe for bringing you thus far. Appreciate your process and progressively move into alignment with who you truly are and who you aspire to be. You may have accumulated a few bruises along the way but you have the power to ignite your own flame to simply just BE great. Re-DeFine your zest for life, for love, for peace, and creativity and create space to heal from your past wounds so that you’re not blocking your blessings to come. Take time to connect to your inner self for guidance, you will never be strayed away from your assignment by following your inner voice.
“You have to maintain a culture of transformation and stay true to your values.” –Jeff Weiner
Peace & Love to you all !
Happy Holidays <3
This blogpost was inspired by these sounds: