How To Improve Your Self Esteem – DeFining Self

self-esΒ·teem /ˈˌself Ι™ΛˆstΔ“m/

noun

confidence in one’s own worth or abilities; self-respect


DeFining Self has to be one of the biggest challenges you may take on within this lifetime. As human beings, we are constantly changing due to our current conditions sometimes for the better and sometimes for the worst. The development of self takes accountability, patience, and wisdom obtained overtime. Constantly investing in improving your reality will grant you lot’s of blessings in the long run but you have to be open to receiving.

Often when we encounter trauma of any kind, we tend to curl up and isolate. When you ball up your fist, there’s no room for anyone to hold your hand or to assist you because your fingers are so tight folded together. This is the same way that our mind works. Many of us react by closing off all attachment to the person, place of things after it has made us uncomfortable. The best solution is to access what made you feel uncomfortable whether it was a specific tone of voice or the action being done unto you and try to understand the cause and effect. I know this may seem very premature by create a 5 W chart to find the cause and effect to your limitations. Asking yourself these very simple yet important questions will give you clarity in order to move forward.

Who:

What:

Where:

When:

Why:

In many situations, we may not be able to see why others act the way that they do and why they navigate the world in the way that they do but it’s up to you to figure out how you’ve contributed to the disconnect. Sometimes it can be as simple as being in the wrong place at the wrong time so don’t think too hard on it, usually the root of the issue is clear as day.

Your current conditions are influenced by what you’re not willing to change JUST YET. Maybe sometime down the line you’ll grow the balls to pursue the life that you truly deserve but for now, this is what we’re working with. This life experience is all about how you work with what you have so this is the perfect time to practice mastering your emotions, your actions, and your thoughts. To do so, you have to find a healthy outlet to fully express yourself.

  • Journaling
  • Audio ( voice recordings/ create a podcast )
  • Speak to a friend/confidant
  • Pray/ Set new intentions

The best gift you can do for your self evolution is making less excuses and more movement towards a brighter future.

The reality is, many of us aren’t born with a silver spoon in our mouths but we still have to set the table (the tone/the foundation). With that being said, you have to invest in your ideal placement but before we can get to that point, you need to boost your confidence to carry out this task with the least amount of resistance. Your reality is only based on your level of self esteem. If you have high self esteem, your reality will reflect that and when you are uncertain about what you can bring into fruition, your reality will reflect that as well. Think of this process like placing your order at a fine dining restaurant.

Introduce yourself : How do you define self ?

What do you want to order: Where do you see yourself in the near future?

Preference : How do you like your blessings? ( rare,medium rare, or well done)


Focus : π™„π™™π™šπ™–π™‘ π˜Ύπ™€π™£π™™π™žπ™©π™žπ™€π™£π™¨ ( Goals/Intentions)

Let’s visualize what the future would look like without the current limitations. How would things look if money,self esteem, and social constructs wasn’t a factor? It’s okay to create goals that are somewhat unrealistic and create your own reality. This will allow for you to dream and to not allow anything that you can’t control to limit you from doing what it is that you desire to do.

You may tweak this list to your liking. Ideally, we all desire things that may not be the β€œnormal” things that others do and that’s okay because this is YOUR LIFE. Don’t set harsh expectations that you’re not ready to taken on as yet, when you’re ready, you’ll know. Once you are able to visualize your ideal future, begin to do some research on how you can bring this to life. Get a notebook from dollar tree and dedicate that book towards your future self. You may use this book as a scrapbook, a journal, or a checklist book to keep track of different aspects of your journey. Whenever you run out of spaces, you may continue to do this until you’ve create a collection of what you’d like to bring to fruition. If you’re not able to do everything, don’t beat yourself up about it. This will allow for you to get an understanding of what you desire and in time, you’ll be able to achieve these goals with obtaining self regard, self confidence, and some form of morale that you stand by.

This is your legacy, this is your life, this is your journey, do your best and leave the rest to God/ the universe.

I know everyone ideal goal is to be happy but happiness is not a guaranteed state of mind. Whenever you’re feeling unhappy, you naturally will lower your vibration by harboring low consciousness and low self esteem. Instead of doing so, find new ways to bring fulfillment into your life.Happiness can be so simple but it is a fleeting idea of life. Redirect your focus to fulfillment in order to maintain the best results of self and your life experience.

Create a list of things that makes you feel fulfilled. I’ll start:

  • Buying New Skincare/Makeup products
  • Buying Vibrant And Funky Clothing
  • Being able to sit near the water
  • Learning more about self/ and others
  • Washing my hair with hair products that smell good
  • Getting my nails done every few months/ finding cool press ons
  • Taking A Bath once a week
  • Going To The Park/Going To A Plant Shop
  • Eating seafood/soul food/ or carribean food
  • Spending Quality Time With My Loved Ones ( in person, over the phone/FaceTime,ect)
  • Listening To Soulection Radio

If you notice, the things that were listed were very specific and it’s because If you’re not specific about what you want, you may divert your focus elsewhere subconsciously.

Theres’s millions of things that can make me happy but I aspire to be the most fulfilled in this lifetime and so should you. Hopefully this has helped you to visualize a future full of love, abundance, and peace.

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